Sunday, December 11, 2011

I Miss You

It's been almost four weeks since you were born
It's been almost four weeks since you died
I miss you
I miss you so much
When we were separated
My body longed to care for you
My heart longed to beat beside yours
I am so lonely for you
This morning I looked up at our skylight
I watched a single ladybug crawl slowly across the window
And I cried
I cried because I miss telling you about the world
I cried for all the ladybugs you'll never see
I sat beside the Christmas tree
And I cried
I cried because I wanted to spend this Christmas with you
I cried for every Christmas we won't be together
I cry for you often
I cry for everything we had
I cry for everything we'll never have
And I know things will get easier
But this winter feels unending
The coldness of your absence makes my heart ache
And I know you are now living in perfect eternity
But it feels as though you belong with me
In my body
Or in my arms
And I'm trying to accept that you're gone
But I miss you
Your life changed my life
So I grieve for you
Because I read that grief is the cost of loving someone
And I loved you so deeply
And will love you forever

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